| Right
after it happens, you may feel:
It may be hard
to decide what to do next. You may want to:
- Find out as
much as you can about what happened.
- Help
yourself and your family
- Help others
who are going through the same thing
A few weeks
after it is over, you may feel:
- Really mad
- In a bad
mood
- Afraid of
the future
- Guilty
because there was nothing you could do
You may also
feel that:
- You don't
trust anyone
- It was
"all too much for me" (overwhelmed)
- You are not
getting enough help
- The help you
are getting is not good enough
- You want to
be alone
The way you
feel may affect your body. You may have:
- No desire to
eat OR you may eat too much
- Upset
stomach
- Headaches
- A hard time
sleeping
- Crying
spells
To
the top |
Here's
what you can do:
For yourself
- Try to eat
meals at the normal times
- Get enough
sleep
- Do some kind
of exercise
- Take a step
back and look at what happened
- Try to solve
problems WITH other people, not alone
- Take some
time to be alone
- Take some
time to be with loved ones or friends
- Try to enjoy
the small things of life
- Go easy. Do
not ask too much of yourself
For your spouse
- Take
sometime to be alone together
- Take time to
talk about what happened
- Keep an open
mind. The way YOU think about what happened may NOT be the way your spouse
sees it.
- Be more
willing to listen
- Take turns
hearing what the other has to say
- Hug each
other
- Don't take
your anger out on the one you love
For your
children
- Kids have
their own way of dealing with things. If you have young children you may
find they:
- Go back to
baby things, like sucking their thumb OR wetting the bed
- Want to be
close to you all the time
- Don't want
to go to bed
- Have bad
dreams
- Cry and
scream
- Pretend that
the "bad thing" never happened
- Become very
quiet
- Don't want
to play active games
- Don't want
to go to school
(con't)
To
the top |
- Start to
have problems at school
- Hug them or
hold them. This makes them feel safe.
- Tell them
about safety rules so they know what to do if it happens again
- Spend more
time with them.
- Try to be
there at bedtime
- Praise them
when they do things right - child is coping
Here are some
things you can do to help your children:
- Talk about
what happened
- Tell them
about it in a way they will understand
- Say how YOU
feel about what happened
- Let them
know they are safe. Tell them this OFTEN
For older
parents, friends or relatives
- Let them
talk about how they feel
- Try to find
out what they are afraid of AND what they need
- Respect what
they say and the choices they make
- Let them
know that they WILL be able to cope. Remind them that they coped with many
other bad or sad things in their life
- Offer to
help them out by driving them places or helping around the house
- If you can't
help them, tell them about people or groups who can
- Plan to do
something with them that they enjoy, like playing cards
- Don't
pressure them to make any big changes, like selling their house
For your
community
- Listen to
people who are having problems
- Say how you
feel about what happened
- Keep in mind
that tempers may be short. Some people may be having a very hard time
- Tell people
where they can go for help, if you know where to go
- Give credit
to all those who are helping out
To
the top |
